Welcome to today's episode, where I’m diving into a topic close to my heart: anxiety.
Anxiety has played a massive role in my life, shaping my experiences and decisions. I want to take you through my journey with it, how I’ve learned to manage it, and offer some practical strategies you can implement to feel less anxious by the time you finish reading.
The Reality of Anxiety in Ireland
Before I get into my personal story, let’s start with a shocking statistic.
According to a 2023 survey by Aware, 74% of Irish adults experience anxiety, with women being more affected. In fact, 82% of women reported struggling with anxiety, compared to 67% of men. Even more alarming, 63% of women over 55 experience frequent anxiety.
This highlights how widespread anxiety is, particularly among women, and it's a reminder that if you're feeling this way, you’re not alone.
My Personal Experience with Anxiety
Anxiety has been a constant in my life for as long as I can remember. My first experience with it was at just eight years old when I started having asthma attacks.
Looking back, I realise those attacks were largely triggered by stress and anxiety. That tight-chested, can’t-breathe feeling would come and go as I grew up, but in my twenties, it escalated into full-blown panic attacks, especially in crowded spaces. It was overwhelming—this suffocating sensation that everything was crashing down on me at once.
At the time, I didn’t understand how much control I could have over my thoughts. Instead, I found ways to numb the anxiety through unhealthy habits, primarily using food and alcohol as coping mechanisms.
When I ran my gym, I found the stress of juggling a business, staff, and clients all too much. I would often stop at the petrol station on my way home, binge on comfort food in the car, and think it was helping me de-stress.
But the reality was, I was trapped in an unhealthy cycle—eating to cope with stress, feeling worse, and then turning to alcohol to unwind at the weekend. The more I drank, the worse the anxiety got, leading to those dreaded Monday mornings where I'd feel shaky and dread-filled as I opened my emails.
I was trapped in this loop for a long time, but I’ve since learned how to manage my anxiety, and I want to share some of the strategies that have made a massive difference in my life.
How I Manage Anxiety Today
Here’s a glimpse into how I’ve transformed my life to keep anxiety at bay:
1. Morning Routine
My morning routine is my foundation. I wake up at 6:15 am and spend the first 10 minutes of the day sitting quietly in a dark room, just breathing and focusing on the present moment.
Some mornings, my mind races, but that’s okay—I’ve learned to recognise when my thoughts are spiralling and gently bring myself back to the present.
After this, I take my dogs for a walk, rain or shine, and immerse myself in nature.
I look up at the sky, notice the trees, and remind myself that I’m part of something much bigger than my own worries.
This routine allows me to start my day on my terms, not on anyone else’s. I’m not scrolling on my phone, reading emails, or listening to the news—just focusing on me.
2. Exercise
I work out three to four times a week, focusing on weight training and low-impact interval training. This isn’t just about staying fit; it’s about managing my anxiety.
Exercise reduces cortisol and adrenaline (the stress hormones) and increases endorphins, which are nature’s mood boosters. Without fail, I feel calmer and more in control after a workout.
3. Journaling
Journaling is another key part of my anxiety management toolkit. I carry my journal with me and jot down whatever comes to mind—whether it’s a to-do list, feelings, or just free-flowing thoughts.
Sometimes, writing things down helps me see that what I’m worried about isn’t that important after all.
4. Staying Present
Anxiety often comes from worrying about the future. By staying in the present moment, I’ve been able to keep my anxiety in check.
I’m a huge fan of Eckhart Tolle’s work on mindfulness, and I’ve trained myself to notice when my mind is drifting towards future worries, gently bringing it back to what’s happening right now. It sounds simple, but it’s incredibly powerful.
One of the biggest triggers for me is social media—particularly Instagram.
Every time I scroll, I feel like I’m not enough. It’s been a huge revelation to identify this and limit my time on social media. Instead, I focus on following accounts that inspire and uplift me, avoiding those that make me feel inadequate.
6. Self-Care and Nurturing All Parts of Me
In the past, I was so focused on being a mother and running my business that I neglected other important aspects of myself. Now, I make a conscious effort to nurture all parts of my life.
Whether it’s connecting with friends, spending time on hobbies, or having fun with my partner, I make sure I’m feeding every part of me, not just the “responsible” parts.
7. Finding Strength Within
Perhaps the most significant shift has been learning to mother myself. I used to look outside of myself for validation, love, and reassurance.
Now, I’ve learned to give myself those things. When I feel myself seeking external validation, I stop, put my hand on my heart, and remind myself that I am enough, just as I am. This has been an absolute game-changer in reducing my anxiety.
Final Thoughts
Managing anxiety is an ongoing journey, and it’s not always easy. But by putting in the work, I’ve been able to transform my life in ways I never thought possible.
If you’re struggling with anxiety, I hope some of these strategies resonate with you and help you on your journey.
Remember, it’s about progress, not perfection, and taking small steps towards a calmer, more grounded version of yourself.
Stay well and keep thriving!
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All my love,
Jessica Cooke