Today's Episode


Hi, how are you?

I'm looking forward to getting stuck into this podcast episode with you today. I love our chats.

Um, a little bit one sided maybe.

Um, but it certainly doesn't feel that way for me now that so many of you are getting in touch with me about your thoughts on each episode, which I love so, so much.

Hello, it is good to be here with you, whether you're listening in your car and walking, cleaning the house, whatever it is that you're up to.

Hello, big love from me to you all the way down from the microwave into your ears, the microwave, the microphone into your ears.

Um I've hurt my back.

I mean, I'm nearly on the mend almost there.

I hurt my back last week would have been in bed while I was sleeping.

Um I jerked my back.

I had a really bad nightmare.

You know what?

I didn't feel great on the Thursday and I had been journaling about what I didn't feel great about something from my past and I went to bed and I had a nightmare, really bad nightmare about it.

And I just completely put my back out.

I think it's a pulled muscle.

Uh, it's recovered, it's recovering every day.

It's feeling better.

But that first morning after I did that, um, I, I couldn't bend over.

It was the most painful thing and carried on into the weekend.

And then, um, I wasn't able to do a workout Monday, however, was able to get back on track Tuesday.

My God, not doing a workout on a Monday that opened my eyes.

I couldn't get over it.

The difference between not doing a workout and doing a workout on a Monday.

You do a workout on a Monday first thing and you feel like every single thing is under control, you're calm, you're productive.

Everything feels amazing and you don't do a workout first thing on a Monday.

And for the first time in a while I was like, yeah, I just felt flatter in indifferent to some things.

Um Yeah, so shout out to anybody who's not working out.

First thing on a Monday, it's a complete game changer.

You go from feeling like your day is really difficult and overwhelming to the most, the superwoman about town and that you can conquer everything.

Throw it all at me and I'm all good all because of a 30 minute workout.

I'm excited to chat to you today about weight loss and the best way to lose weight.

If you're a woman over 40 I don't like to make health so much about weight loss.

However, I do like to touch off it every now and again.

Um, I think it's important to talk about it, especially when I know so many people are struggling with weight loss.

55% of women are overweight or obese in Ireland.

I can, well believe it.

There's so many negative messaging and horrific stuff in the weight loss industry and we're all constantly being bombarded with rubbish fad diets and things that don't work and things that just keep us obsessed and on the hamster wheel of weight loss.

God, it's awful.

So I just wanted to make this one so we could have a good chat about the worst things to do and the best things to do if you are struggling with your weight at the moment.

It's funny, you know, you know, if you listen to these episodes, I've lost three stone myself.

I've been three stone overweight for a long time.

And then, um, I was, I fluctuated an awful lot.

I've been gaining and losing.

Not anymore.

A couple of years ago I started focusing on the right things and it worked.

But I've been fluctuating on and off with the stone, stone and a half, two stone for years and years and years.


Um, for the past nine years I have been gaining and losing and gaining and losing.

And anyway, um I met a woman who I hadn't seen in about six years this morning and it was so funny.

Shout out to you Dell.

Um She said, oh my God, you've lost so much weight.

Oh my God, you've lost so much weight.

And she was just, she was about to say that's because you're, she was like, she was about to say to me, is that because you're exercising more?

And um I was like, no, no.

Um I've, I've just become really peaceful and calm.

I was only after I was like, what a weird way to answer her question.

Um She was like, is that because of more movement?

Yeah, I was like, no, no, no.

It's because I've become more peace and calm, but it really is a byproduct of me becoming more peaceful and calm, which is what I want to chat to you in some parts about today's episode.

She must have thought I was absolutely crackers, but it was true and it was the truth that came out of my mouth.

Chatting to her, um, chatting to Dell this morning was good to see Ale.

Um, but it's true.

Peace and calm, peace and calm.

Um, so it got me thinking about weight loss and then when I was just doing a little bit of research for this episode and seeing how many women are dieting, um, the latest things that I could get was from 2018.

I know that's a long time ago, but there was a point in 2018 in Ireland.

I don't think they've done this survey since that one in two women were on a diet.

Uh, which if you think about it is crazy.

I mean, when you think about all those women out there struggling to feel good in their clothes, that, that sense of feeling out of control, not in control of your own body is just so frustrating.

That awful feeling when you, when you get up in the morning time and you have your shower and you stick on your jeans and you're just going.

Oh, Jesus Christ.

Here we go again.

A day of obsessing about my food because I feel like absolute crap in my clothes.

Um, so the way I want to do this episode, um, and just to give you a little bit of background of who I am.

Um, I'm a fitness coach for women over 40 I help women get fit and feel great and find their inner peace and calm and I have struggled for years and years with weight loss, um, with unhealthy habits.

I've been shackled to many unhealthy habits for years.

In fact, um, I've done everything under the sun.

I've done all the slimming clubs, the weight loss clubs that I'm not gonna mention all of them.

Calorie counted.

I've dieted, I've, um, gone extreme on my, um, fat diets on exercise.

II, I have done it all.

And, you know, one day years ago a friend asked me, would, I like to go and join her for a workout.

And I said, yeah, ok, I'll give that a go.

And, um, you know, I hated every minute of it but I had an epiphany after that workout in the sense that I felt amazing and I felt the best I'd ever felt in years.

So, after I did that work out with her and, you know, I huffed and puffed and struggled, I decided I was going to forget and not do anything that I had ever done because it wasn't working.

And I was always going back to square one.

Any time I lost some of the weight, I always put it back on again and I was never able to stick with my healthy habits.

But that night I decided, you know what, there's something in this, I am going to work out for 30 minutes three times a week and I'm only going to focus on that and I'm only going to become consistent on that and I stuck with it.

And through that habit, my whole life changed.

Um, it, it was like a positive habit.

It was a, it was a platform on which for me to start improving all my other habits.

And that's the most beautiful thing about exercise.

It puts you in a better frame of mind to then go forth and make better decisions.

You are just likely to make better decisions when you exercise.

For example, when you work out three times a week, you're more likely to become naturally more tired.

And that means you're going to naturally want to get to bed a little bit earlier.

You're going to start having more energy, you're going to feel better in yourself.

You're going to feel better mentally, you're gonna feel better in your body.

You're also more likely to make better food choices when you exercise.

So everything improves, you're more productive, you're more calm, you're more in control fact, when you work out and this is what happened for me and everything changed for me.

That, that, that, that, that, that, that day.

And then a couple of years ago I still had unhealthy habits with me.

Um, up until two years ago I was drinking too much alcohol.

I was turning to food for comfort.

Let's just call it overeating.

I was overeating.

Um, what was making me gain weight was I was eating too much food and that was getting stored as fat on my body.

And, you know, it's helpful for you if you're listening to this and you're struggling with your weight to just call it out really scientifically and keep it really black and white for yourself.

Well, I find this helps me.

I'm eating too much.

That food is getting stored as fat on my body.

And for most of us I know there's, um, there's, there's different things going on for some of you, but I am just talking about overeating now, um, that if you are overeating, it's going to get stored on your body as fat and there, and there really is very little you can do about it.

I mean, in the sense that you can't exercise it off, the only way is to eat less, which I'm going to talk about in a few minutes.

Um, and then there's a way to do that and it wasn't until a couple of years ago that I, when COVID hit actually, and I closed the gym, I had a, a women's only gym on the Tomb Road in Galway.

Very successful gym.

It was going great.

COVID hit the gym closed.

I decided to move online.

Actually, I came to a crossroads in my life.

I was, it was like day five of lockdown, the gym had been closed.

I couldn't believe it.

Well, we had decided to close the gym and I had started drinking every night when the when lockdown hit.

And I remember waking up one morning crying day six of a hangover, I said to Joe, I'm at a crossroads here.

I just knew I was at a crossroads.

I said I can continue going as I am, the gym is closed.

I can put the feet up, do nothing about it.

Keep drinking alcohol, eating crap food or I can rise up and be a leader.

It sounds dramatic now, But they were the words I used, I can rise up now be a leader, move everything online and pretty much get my stuff together, get my shit together.

And I did and it was the best decision I ever made.

Not only is it pure joy coaching so many women in our amazing community of women, I healed in that period of time, my relationship with food and it was, it was in that time, I had an epiphany that if you want to lose weight, if you want to be fit and feel good and get healthy.

A holistic approach needs to be taken to your health.

A holistic approach focusing on one thing is never going to work.

If you focus just on your fitness, you are never guaranteed to lose weight or become more calm or less stressed.

If you focus just on the food, you're going to be obsessed, you're not gonna become fit, it's not gonna help you become more peaceful and calm.

A holistic approach is the only way to become fit and healthy.

And I am the example of that I fitness was in my life from that moment that my friend brought me to a workout and I decided to commit three times a week.

However, up until a couple of years ago, I was a massive comfort eater.

I was turning to food for comfort, big portions, overeating, undereating, restricting.

Um, I was drinking too much alcohol.

I was, I was looking outside of myself to um heal and it was, it was, it was through COVID that when I started to do what we do now in my thrive coaching called Thrive Time and actually taking a holistic approach where I worked on my mental health, my self care and all the little action steps that go with that.

And uh did I did, I did I actually finally lose the weight, find peace and calm and understand on a deep level what it takes to become healthy and to finally say goodbye to the uh the dieting and the restricting and the, the yo yoing and the circling and hence thrive coaching was born.

And that's what I do with my wonderful clients now and now I get to watch them on their journey.

Um Taking a holistic approach to their health, I get to watch them finding more peace and calm in their life, finding consistency with the exercise and finding a over time, a good relationship with their nutrition for some for the first time in their lives.

And it is truly, truly amazing.

Um OK, so I want to chat to you for a few moments about the worst ways to lose weight.

If you're a woman over 40.

Number one, it's got to be over reliance on fad diets, fad diets that promise rapid weight loss with little effort are 100% unsustainable and most of them don't provide the necessary nutrients for long term health.

And I'm going to throw the keto diet in their detox diet.

Extreme low carb diets, they don't work.

They rob you of nutrients, especially taking out carbs from your diet.

You gets rid of your energy, then you've no energy you get really, you get really demotivated and then when you feel really demotivated, you just go back on all the crap again.

And in my 14 years now of coaching women, I see this all the time women that start with me that have been through every diet under the sun and fad diets, you know, they're so bad because there's a lack of long term success with them.

They promise quick and dramatic results.

But the results are always short lived.

Once the diet stopped, you always see people regaining the lost weight and more.

And you know what the worst thing is, this cycle of weight loss and regain, which is known as yo, yo, dieting can be really bad for your health.

Also fad diets usually focus on a narrow range of food or some like the Keto, getting rid of food groups that leads to nutrient deficiencies.

As you know, getting rid of some essential vitamins, minerals, macro, nutrient nutrients needed for health, which can just leave your skin looking like crap.

Your hair feeling horrible.

Your energy levels whacked, not sleeping, well, not focusing, not concentrating.

They're so unsustainable, they're overly restrictive, they're difficult to maintain feelings of deprivation, frustration And eventually, you know, the crack if you're listening in and you've done these fad diets, a return to unhealthy eating habits which is soul destroying fad diets are crap.

They've got such metabolic consequences.

Extreme calorie counting and going up and down over time slows down your metabolism 100%.

It slows down your metabolism.

And then when you go back to eating normal eating patterns, your body, your, your, your body burns calories less efficiently making it easier to gain weight.

So you restrict yourself, loads.

Your metabolism may slow down, then you get back to normal eating patterns.

Your metabolism slowed.

Your body is burning less calories at rest.

You can gain weight much more easily.

And that might be one of the reasons if you're listening in why you feel like you've ballooned out the second, you've reverted back to normal, eating a loss of muscle mass.

And boy, do we need the muscle mass when we're over 40?

Because that's the stuff that keeps our metabolism high and gets us burning fat at rest and it mightn't feel like it, it might feel brilliant when you're doing a fad diet and you feel like you're losing weight quickly, but often it's a result of a loss of muscle mass alongside the fat that you're losing.

Again, this affects your metabolism, making it harder to lose weight in the long term and potentially leading to a higher percentage of body fat in the long run.

Shout out, I have to say it now, why the weighing scales are so bad?

That's just another example of the weighing scales are so bad.

So you've gone on this fad diet.

You think you're losing weight, you're actually losing muscle mass along with some fat, that's not gonna work because your metabolism is going to slow down metabolism, slowing down means you're just going to be burning less calories at rest.

That's gonna be really hard to maintain weight loss.

So you're gonna get a higher percentage of body fat, potentially a lower percentage of lean muscle mass.

So you're just going to gain weight and the weighing scales isn't going to be accurate.

It never is anyway.

So fad diets have to be the number one thing to avoid if you're a woman over 40 if you want to lose weight number two.

And I see it all the time, excessive exercise exercise as you know, it's brilliant for weight loss and for over all health.

And I believe that weight exercise is amazing for weight loss in a roundabout way.

Like I'm not talking just about the calories you burn after a really great workout because remember when we do strength training, it's the calories burned after as we move through our days, that's really important.

I'm not even talking about that.

Exercise is brilliant for weight loss in the sense that it helps you make better choices in your day when you work out.

And in that sense, it helps you lose weight and has such a beautiful, lovely knock on effect to all the other habits that you want to sort in your life.

Um, but extreme exercise, doing too much exercise can lead to burnout injuries and a really unhealthy fixation on weight loss.

Extreme exercise regimes aren't sustainable and they can result in muscle loss and metabolic imbalances.

It can be really tricky to know if you're over exercising.

All I know is that a couple of years ago before I was healed before I was healed on my journey, I used to over exercise and I didn't know it at the time, but I was always, I was, I would do a workout, I would do 4 to 5 workouts a week and I would walk every day for a minimum of 30 minutes.

And when I look back now I was driven by weight loss, but I wasn't focusing on what was making me gain weight.

That was too unpleasant to think about it.

I didn't want to be thinking that I was eating too much food and have to address that.

I just wanted to continue to work out.

And if you're out there pounding the pavements every day, just work out, work out, work out, walk, walk, walk and you're doing it to try to lose weight.

There's something you're avoiding looking at.

And this was me, it's why I know it inside out.

And I've also been coaching women for so long.

Now, you, you always can see patterns after you've been a coach for a period of time myself included.

If you're, if you're just always wanting to go for a workout because you feel like your weight is too much.

It's, it's not that you need to exercise more.

In fact, exercising more is like putting, it's like masking the problem for you.

What would happen if you exercise less, you'd probably feel really stressed out that you were gaining weight more rapidly.

However, it would force you to look at the real areas that you need to look at that are making you gain weight.

It might force you to sit down and say, my God, I, I'm comfort eating.

God, I'm really struggling to eat less food.

Why is that?

Am I stressed out?

And for years I overexercised and actually what I needed to do was reduce stress and anxiety in my life.

I didn't need more workouts.

And when you're, when you're constantly fixated on the food or when you're constantly fixated on the exercise, you're doing yourself no favors.

You're better off turning your attention to the other areas, taking a holistic approach.

And if you have to go through a period of time where you gain a little bit even more weight from doing less exercise and being less obsessed with the food, then that's just what you're going to have to do to eventually come out the other end and feel amazing in your clothes.


So the next thing, diet pills and supplements, I'm just going to throw it out there.

I don't even want to talk about it.

I'm hoping nobody in this listening to this has ever touched diet pills or fat burning stuff or weight loss supplements.

II, I don't even know anything about them.

All I know is that I've never touched them, wouldn't go near them.

So let's move on from that.

Um Emotional eating, emotional eating can be a huge reason why people are, why you are gaining weight is one of the reasons that kept me uh overweight for so many years and locked in a yo yo of weight gain and weight loss.

And that's using food as a way to cope with stress, anxiety or other emotions and that leads to overeating or weight gain.

So I ask you dear listener, do you use food as a way to cope with stress or anxiety?

And you know, I meet a lot of women who initially say no to that.

And then when you dig a little bit deeper, you realize that they do or they come to the realization that they do.

Um But emotional eating can be in many ways, it's controlling your food as a way to cope.

It might be that you under eat at some point that you skip meals that you don't eat breakfast.

Um because you're stressed out or because you're trying to uh overcompensate for all the emotional eating that you did the night before.

And the most common one really is sitting on the couch at night and eating.

Um Another emotional eating can be if you're with work colleagues and you can't seem to stay away from the biscuit tin.

Like there's a reason that you can't stay away from the sweets and the biscuits.

There's a reason why and many people say it's because they have a sweet tooth, but I don't accept that.

Uh let's just say the whole world has a sweet tooth like this savory, I'm savory or sweet.

You're just letting yourself off the hook and I want you to get all the results that you want for the rest of your life so that you don't have to think about it.

And if you ever hear yourself saying I have a sweet tooth, I want you to look at the possibility that you're, that, that sentence is keeping you away from the real reason that you're overweight and that you may be using sugary foods, sweet foods as a way to cope with stress or anxiety or other emotions.

If you are not able to say no in the evening times or when you're in work to sweet stuff, you have an unhealthy attachment there.

If you're not able to say no something's up.

And when I started to think like this, my life changed when I started to get really honest with myself.

No, Jessica, you don't just love wine.

You're not able to say no to the 5th, 6th and 7th glass of wine.

No, Jessica, you're not.

You don't seem able to have just two biscuits after dinner.

Why is that?

And for years, I said I'll have a sweet tooth.


Come on, you're actually not able to say no, even though all you want to do is to be fit and healthy and feel good in your clothes and yet you still can't stay away from the biscuit tin.

While I ask you, what's up?

Are you stressed out?

Are you super anxious?

Are you thinking of something that has happened to you in the past?

There's something else going on.

Emotional eating doesn't address those underlying issues.

It creates an unhealthy relationship with food.

That's the area you need to look at.

Speaking of emotional eating, um it can also be huge portions.


It doesn't even have to be huge portions, big portions.

If you find yourself at the dinner table reaching for more food when you don't need it.

That's emotional eating.

What else is it?

What, what else is it?

If you, if in my, in my experience, if you have an inability to say no to yourself, if you have an inability to say no, I'm done.

I'm not going to have secondss or no, I'm not having a dessert after dinner.

Then there's something else going on and there's an unhealthy attachment there that you are needing to plug into yourself.

Another one that is going to keep you away from losing weight is the weighing scales.

Um, you know, I talk about this on the podcast all the time, but the weighing scales doesn't work.

And do you remember a couple of weeks ago for those of you that listen, every week I was chatting about a client of mine who was on a group check in.

She about, it was about four weeks ago now and she was doing amazing.

She was working at three times a week.

She was eating healthy.

Um, she did, she, she, she did really healthy habits for a couple of weeks.

She jumped on the weighing scales and she, the weighing scales didn't show her what she thought would show her.

She was really disheartened.

I'm so glad she jumped on the check in so we could chat it through.

Um, but she was so disheartened and she, it threw her off for a few days.

It threw her off her, uh, healthy eating habits.

Shout out to you, Cecilia if you're listening.

Um, and it threw her off a lot.

She was really disappointed and we had a chat, told her to throw out the weighing scales.

I reminded her of how rubbish they are that they don't show your body fat composition.

They don't show if you're losing fat if you're lifting weights at the same time.

Well, lean muscle mass weighs more than fat.

So you're going to lose weight, but you're not going to see it on scales.

You know, your clothes are going to get looser.

Um, but anyway, just to follow up with that story, she jumped on to a check in.

Um, I think it's last week and she's getting on amazing.

Her clothes are looser.

She's losing weight.

She's not going on the weighing scales now, but she can, she can see she's losing weight because her clothes are, she's getting smaller and her clothes, her clothes are becoming more baggy and isn't that so amazing?

And that story there is the exact reason why I hate the weighing scales so much and why they aren't doing anything for you.

They're really negative.

All it's doing is keeping a horrible person on your shoulder telling you how fat and horrible and what a failure you are every day of the week.

And I know it's difficult to keep away from the weighing scales, but they really are the worst judge in letting you know if you're fit or healthy or, or, or what you are, it doesn't take into account your height, your, your, your body fat percentage.

All it does is it just weighs you as a whole.

You could have the leanest muscle mass and look terrific in your clothes.

However, the number that it says on the scales mightn't reflect that in your eyes so it can make you feel that you're overweight and all of a sudden you're getting very feeling based and not fact based.

And it's one of the reasons why I love making sure that I feel good that I fit good in my clothes because it's factual if, if you want to be a size 14 or 12 or 10 or eight or 16, whatever is healthy to you and you get there, that's factual.

You know, it, it, it's, it's, you're not worrying about water attention or if you had a heavy dinner or if your clothes are all off.

If you're naked when you stand on the scales, if you're lifting weights, uh it doesn't matter about all of that.

If you're fitting into your size 14 jeans or whatever size it is, you are good to go and what you're doing is working.

And uh that's just the reason why the wing scales need to be thrown in the bin.

The wing scales is keeping you locked in this negative cycle and it's, and it's keeping you away from the journey, being a positive journey, the positive, the, the journey of being overweight and unhealthy to changing and transforming is the coolest journey.

It's the most fun journey.

When you're focusing on the positives and on the action steps, it's the most shit journey.

It's, it's a journey that I did for 20 years of um calorie counting and dieting and weighing yourself.

Oh my God.

Shoot me.


It's the most depressing negative journey you could possibly be on.

And you've got blinkers on when, when you are in that frame of mind, when all you can think about is weight loss, you've got blinkers on to how fresh the air feels when you go for a walk because you're just thinking you've got to pound the pavement.

It takes you away from all the lovely feelings you can have in a workout because you're just thinking, I've got to lose weight.

I've got to lose weight.

I'm determined.

I'm determined.

It takes you away from how tasty food can be because you're just thinking, is this going to help me lose weight?

Is this gonna make me gain weight?

It robs you of so much stuff that's enjoyable in life.

So when you ditch the weighing scales and you ditch fat diets and calorie counting and tracking your food and weighing your food and you focus on becoming healthy on transforming your health.

The journey is amazing.

You smell the fresh air.

You hear the birds when you're walking, you enjoy your workouts, ok.

Showing up can still feel pretty bad, but in your workouts, they can be enjoyable, food, can be really healthy, treat nights can taste amazing again.

Um And all because you've decided to focus on the person you're becoming and the action steps that you're following this successful woman who is loving themselves from the inside out, who's focused on their mental health, their self care, their physical movement, who is a shining beacon who is a role model to everybody.

Looking at them how cool this person that's radiating calm and peace and positivity and health and fitness as opposed to this woman over there that's giving out about her weight and jumping on the weighing scales and dieting and moaning and complaining and eating different food to her family.

No, thanks.

What a crappy role model.

I have been in those years to the people around me complaining and moaning about my weight, picking up food binge, eating at food.

No, I want to be that female version of Tony Robbins.

I want to be a leader, healthy fit and strong letting go of all that rubbishy stuff that holds us back and it just demeaning takes our power away, the weighing scales takes your power away.

If you find yourself on a calculator, counting your calories who has the power there.

If you're tracking your food on a crappy app, who's holding your power, who is holding your power?

Is it you or is it somebody else or something else?

Your Fitbit, who's in control you or your Fitbit?

You or your step tracker is 10,000, 20,000 steps really important or is it just keeping you locked in this cycle of counting and tracking and counting and tracking?


Excessive exercise, negative dieting, negative, over reliance on fad diets, negative, yo, yo, dieting, we're going to say no to that too.

We don't do that anymore.


I'm going to go with one more.

I could pick for so many, but I'm going to go with one more and that's um ignoring your mental health.

Now you would think having had panic attacks really bad panic attacks and anxiety for years that I wouldn't have ignored my mental health, but I would have ignored anything as long as it helped me lose weight.

So way back when the story that I told you of when I, my friend invited me to go for a workout and, and that habit changed my life.

Um Now back then, that habit helped me overcome panic attacks and a lot of anxiety.

However, I kept a lot of stress and anxiety with me over the years.

It's only been the past couple of years that I started taking care of my mental health.

So even though I was exercising and that did stop the panic attacks, I ignored my mental health because I was so focused on weight loss and ignoring your mental health.

And I know this episode is about weight loss.

So obviously, ignoring your mental health brings along a whole host of problems.

But to keep it in line with this podcast episode, ignoring your mental health and you are stressed out and anxious.

Oh my God, how are you going to lose weight?

I wish somebody had asked me that question years ago, Jessica, how are you going to lose weight if you're stressed out and anxious and, and you're not addressing that?

Now, that to me makes complete sense now.

But for 20 years, that if you would have told me that, why didn't one of you tell me that you ignore your stress and anxiety.

So what are you going to do?

You might turn to food for comfort.

You might binge eat at the weekends.

You might have an over reliance on takeaways takeaways for me back in the day where the biggest escapism feeling I could have that feeling of the delivery man arriving.

Oh, grabbing it out of his hands, throwing €2 into his hand or whatever and sitting down pressing play and whatever it was.

Nobody speaks to me.

Nobody talked to me.

Joe, don't talk to me.

Don't even ruin one bite of my takeaway.

My Indian takeaway and what a bite would have been ruined if somebody had spoken to me.

And it was the biggest escapism ever.

I can feel it.

Now, I can just remember it so well.

Sitting on the couch watching TV.

Everything's ok because I'm stuffing my face with take away.

Um God, I was so stressed out, ignoring your mental health might lead you to keep on drinking too much wine again.


So you're always going to continue to struggle with your weight loss.

And if you ignore your mental health and you, you continue to struggle with your weight loss, all you're going to do is go around and around in circles because chances are you're going to focus on the nutrition or the fitness or both, but you're still going to be stressed or anxious or you're still going to have low self esteem or a negative body image, all these other uh emotional struggles that we can have and it's going to keep you trapped in that overweightness.

So if you could draw a line right now with me in the sand or on your pen and paper or just visually, just say, OK, I'm done.

I am done and I'm going to rise up now and become the person that I want to become through my actions.

Then this is a perfect time for you that you can say goodbye to all that negativity.

And it's exciting.

Get excited the journey towards good health when you're not weighed down by calorie counting and dieting is really good fun.

So simple action steps for you to follow, to lose weight.

My five step framework.

Pms, I know I always talk about it.

Everything is in that road map, that framework, that step by step, guide palms your physical movement.

If you're a woman over 40 you want to lose weight, you have got to be doing strength training three times a week for 30 minutes.

You know, it, it is the best.

It gets your metabolism high.

It gets you burning calories at rest.

It turns you into a calorie burning machine.

Your metabolism is high.

You take back control of your body.


The A stands for accountability and support.

Who is holding you accountable?

Who is supporting you on your journey?


That's simple.

Two liters of water every day.

Don't neglect it.

It's a big win and can really help you with weight loss.

Um Mental health focusing on your mental health, taking a holistic approach.

It sounds like you're doing it the long way.

But how can you reduce your stress?

How can you reduce anxiety?

What boundaries do you need to implement and put into your life?

Are you working too hard?

Do you work too late?

Are you contactable all the time?

Do your family know that there's times where you can't be reached because you're taking care of yourself.

Do you sit in silence?

Do you read a good fiction book?

Do you get to bed on time?

Do you turn the TV off and sometimes just read a couple of pages of a good book?

Do you chat with a friend?

Over coffee.

The mental health aspect of weight loss or your journey of weight loss is so important.

And if you were to forget the fad diets and the obsession with food and started a journey of reducing your stress, living a more mindful life, bringing mindfulness into your days, living in the present moment, genuinely working at becoming more peaceful.

Unlocking your inner peace, you'll heal your relationship with food.

You won't turn to food for comfort.

You won't overeat and that's how you lose weight.

You fix your issues.

Where are your issues with food?

I guarantee you.

It's not that a nutritionist hasn't handed you the perfect plan.

Where are you?

What are you doing?

Are you overeating?

Are you skipping breakfast?

Are you having a massive dinner?

Are you eating loads and loads of pasta and rice every week?

Are you eating way too much sugar?

Are you having too many takeaways?

Are you just eating too much food?

Are you snacking way too often?


Why are you doing that?

And your answer right there is the secret is the key to you losing weight.

Whatever way you answered?


Why do you do it?

Oh, because I'm stressed out and anxious.



So you need to focus on your stress and your anxiety, self-care.

The s part of Pam's my road map.

My five step framework P A HMS.

Physical fitness, accountability and support, hydration, mental health, self care, self care under that umbrella goes, your nutritional action steps, nutrition needs to be looked at, but it's only one aspect, it doesn't even get its own letter in Pam's.

And there's a reason I did that nutrition is just a small part of your health when you take a holistic approach.

But the weight loss industry wants you to think it is the way to lose weight.

But I'm sure you've noticed by now that when you're obsessed about your nutrition, you gain weight, self-care.

Also looking at your bedtime routine, your morning routine and some of you might be thinking, I know what you're thinking.

Now, you are telling me for me to lose weight.

You want me to look at my bedtime routine.

Yes, through looking at your bedtime routine and your morning routine and your mental health action steps, your physical fitness, your accountability and support your hydration.


In there lies the healthy, you, the healthy you that heals your relationship with food, through your mental health action, steps through your self-care action steps.

Who does the right type of exercise that builds lean muscle that gets you fit and strong, gets you high metabolism.

But these, these are all just that's all the logical stuff.

You know.

Of course, if you do strength training and your metabolism, that's not fixing the reasons why you're overweight.

And if you're listening to this and going around and around in circles, you feel like you're going around and around in circles it's because you are because you're too focused on the, what, what can I eat to lose weight?

And the answer isn't in there.

Oh, well, I'll have just one of those mini bars after dinner.

Maybe that'll work.


Why are you overeating?

Get really straight with yourself.

Why are you overeating?

Why are you eating too much food that your body can't handle?

So instead it's storing as fat and you're gaining weight.

Pms the five step framework, physical fitness, your physical movement, your accountability and support your hydration, your mental health, your self care, you can do this, keep it positive and keep it focused on your action steps and throw those bloody weighing scales in the bin.

Dear listener.

I hope you found this helpful.

I have a favor to ask of you.

Now, if you're enjoying my podcasts, I would please love for you to just rate it on whatever platform you're listening to whatever it is.

Spotify Apple.

If you're listening now, after this episode is over, which it is now, please rate it.

It would mean the world to me.

It means that my podcast will just be getting in front of more people in front of more women who will actually benefit from this podcast.

Thank you so so much for listening.

I'll see you on the next one.

All my love and take care.

I hope you enjoyed this podcast episode and you must let me know by getting in touch don't forget you can head on over to Jessica Cook dot IE where you'll find lots of free stuff to get.

You started on your journey.

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